A new indication for Invisalign

Invisalign photos-1

On my way to the gym, I ran into a patient I’ll call Peter. As we chatted, I could sense his eyes drifting downward to catch a glimpse of my teeth. I was wearing my Invisalign, the clear plastic braces, and I am very self conscious when I speak. 

“So I see you’re wearing your Invisalign?” he said matter of factly. 

“Yes, I’m so embrassed. I hardly ever wear them in public because I salivate when I talk.”

“How long have you been wearing them?”

“For nearly a year, but I don’t wear them like I’m supposed to. My dentist, Dr. Avo Samuelian, told me to wear them for twenty hours a day.”

“I loved wearing them,” he said. “Do you know how much weight I lost because you can’t eat while they’re in?”

“That didn’t happen to me. In fact, I’d popped them out, eat and then pop them right back in again. It doesn’t matter though. I only have one more set to go.”

“It’s still not over,” he warned. “You have to wear the retainer every night for a year after that so your teeth set.”

“That’s okay. The retainer at night I can deal with. It keeps me from grinding my teeth.”

“Do you know I loved wearing my Invisalign,” he said leaning in closer to reveal a secret. “I gave the best blow job of my life wearing them.”

“Excuse me?”

“I was dating this well endowed ex-porn star, and he loved when I gave him a blow job wearing my Invisalign.”


“Because the plastic was smooth and your teeth are all pointed and jagged.” I said jokingly. He stared back with a look to indicate that I was correct.  “Well maybe you should call the makers of Invisalign and see if they want to redirect their marketing to include a boast about “Better on your man’s penis than your stubbly own teeth.”

Peter rolled his eyes. “My dentist told me that he tells everyone that they will give the blow job of their life wearing their Invisalign. That is old news Spinelli. Have a good workout.”

Apparently, you really do learn something new everyday. 

Later when I returned home, I couldn’t stop thinking about what Peter said. Then I recalled a commercial when I was younger about Pearl Drops’ Tooth Polish. I can still see that girl licking her teeth. “Mmm, it’s a great feeling,” she said with relish. Maybe that was what Peter was referring to?

Click below to get an updated reminder of the past. 


One Comment

  1. Posted June 18, 2009 at 4:27 pm | Permalink

    Hey Frank, I just moved to NYC and found this great Orthodontist that specializes in invisalign. I totally recommend her and you should too!
    Invisalign NYC

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