Tweens and Drugs

Tweens. You gotta love them? Miley Cyrus, Taylor Swift, Taylor Lautner and all their young friends who’ve infiltrated my aging world. They’re all so wholesome and pure. Why the Jonas Brothers don’t even believe in premarital sex.

That’s why it broke my old heart to learn that pot and pills used to treat ADHD have surpassed smoking cigarettes as the most abused substance among teens. A National survey published by the University of Michigan declared cigarette smoking among teens has dropped to its lowest level since 1975. Meanwhile researchers reported a major increase in pot use and pills for ADHD.

Use of pot, prescription painkillers and medication to treat Attention Deficit Disorder like Ritalin, Adderall and even Provigil are said to have replaced smoking cigarettes. Crystal Meth was also high on the list. Even Salvia was included. Salvia is a natural herb from the mint family, is not illegal and is said to induce a brief high after chewing.

Now I’m no prude. I remember when I was in high school. I tried pot, but honestly, it made me very paranoid. To the best of my knowledge alcohol was the most widely abused drug back then. Pot was also very popular among the “cool kids” as well as Qualudes and Mescaline. Remember those?

It bothers me to think that the Taylors might be getting high. Sure I can see Miley getting smashed and having a three-way but not Miss Swift. She’s just a innocent baby.

Oh, you tweens. Don’t rush into my adult world so quickly. It’s not that great, and once you dip your toe in Lindsey Lohan’s toxic aged pool, you might find your flesh has been eaten away and there is only some residual bone and a lot less cartilage left behind.

Sex, drugs and Rock and Roll sound hip and cool, but before you know it, you’ll be thirty and like Tara Reid, on your second round of plastic surgery and air brushing the shit out of your pics in Playboy.

Have a Diet Coke with lemon instead.

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