Notes from the front line 3

Jim – Doc, I just want to lose this (grabs a fold of fat around his belly).

Dr. S – You need to diet.

J – Diet! I’m 5’9” and 160 pounds. How much weight do you want me to lose?

S – You don’t need to lose weight. You need to watch what you eat. Too lose that, you need to cut out carbs.

J – I cut carbs.

S – Yeah, you cut carbs with a knife and then stick them in your mouth.

J – I want steroids.

S – Absolutely not.

J – Come on doc. I’m single and 50 years old. I need to get in shape in order to stay in the running with all these young guys.

S – You’re single because you want to be.

J – No. Seriously. I want to be in a relationship, but all the guys I meet don’t want to be in a relationship.

S – That’s because you’re meeting guys on-line. Right?

J – Yes, but I’ve met some great guys on-line.

S – You mean you’ve had great sex with guys you’ve met on-line.

J – I’m dating a guy now I met on-line.

S – Let me ask you a question? Are you one of those guys who has to have sex first before you date them, like taking them out on a test drive.

J – Yeah, what’s wrong with that? The guy I’m dating now is nice. The sex is okay, but I have fun with him. The only problem is that he’s in recovery for alcohol and crystal. And to top that, he’s gluten-free. I’m like man, you gotta give me a break. At least let me have one.

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2 Comments

  1. danh
    Posted July 22, 2010 at 1:55 pm | Permalink

    u must have loved yr job! 🙂

  2. Mich
    Posted July 23, 2010 at 1:31 pm | Permalink

    Is there gluten in alcohol?


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